~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Some day my prince will come
Some day we'll meet again
And away to his castle we'll go
To be happy forever I know
Some day when spring is here
We'll find our love anew
And the birds will sing
And wedding bells will ring
Some day when my dreams come true
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Have you ever had an ideal? Someone you measured all men up to? A man that could be real or fictional?
My ideals changed a lot through out life. My first one was probably Gilbert, from Anne of Green Gables. Tall, with his dark hair, so handsome. Loving Anne for all that she is, but being completely honest with her, their chemistry, their arguments, and Anne punishing Gil, but then forgiving him for how could she not?
Anne: Fred is... extremely good.
Marilla: That is exactly what he should be! Would you want to marry a wicked man?
Anne: Well, I wouldn't marry anyone who was really wicked, but I think I'd like it if he could be wicked and wouldn't.
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Anne: Our friendship, it won't ever be the same now. Why can't he (Gilbert) just be sensible instead of acting like a sentimental schoolboy?
Marilla: Because he loves you.
Anne: He loves me? I can't know why.
Marilla: Because you made Josie Pye and Ruby Gillis, and all of those wishy-washy young ladies who waltzed by him look like spineless nothings.
Anne: Marilla, he's hardly my idea of a romantic suitor.
Marilla: Anne, you've tricked something out of that imagination of yours that you call romance. Have you forgotten how he gave up the Avonlea school for you so you could stay here with me? He picked you up everyday in his carriage so that you could study your courses together? Don't toss it away for some ridiculous ideal that doesn't exist.
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See? I really AM a modern day Anne Shirley.
My next ideal was Prince Char from my favorite book, "Ella Enchanted". He was so wonderfully heroic, and sweet, and funny. Willing to have fun with Ella, rather than being stuck up royalty. He fell in love with her silliness, her jokes, her pranks, her spirit, determination and courage. She fell in love with the way he loved her, his genuine character, his chivalry, his need to protect and care for her, how he was always up for any adventure with her, no matter how ridiculous.
After that, it was Mr. Knightley from Jane Austen's "Emma".
And then it was Dimitri from "Anastasia".
Then it was Mr. Big from "Sex and the City" (shortest lived).
Now, my current ideal is Jim Clancy, from my favorite TV show, "Ghost Whisperer".
My ideals always have to do with the character of the man, his looks of course, and then how he and the heroine met and fell in love. Also, how he values others compared to himself and how he interacts, what he cares about, and what his passions are.
In the "Ghost Whisperer", Jim and Melinda meet when her apartment building starts on fire. Jim is a fireman (oooo, sexy! Uniformed hero!) and hurries Melinda out of the building along with others. He quickly moves her along by her arm, as she complains "I can walk just fine on my own, thank you!" He pushes her under the yellow taped off parameter around the apartment saying "Your welcome." She yells "My shoe!" as he rushes off again, then stops grabs her shoe and throws it at her feet before running back into the burning building. Melinda sees the ghost of a woman who's husband is still trapped in the building. Melinda yells at Jim, gets his attention and insists that there is still someone in the building, even after he assures her twice that its clean. He still goes in though on her word, and they find the man right where his wife's ghost said he'd be and get him out before the building collapses in flames.
Later, as Melinda is walking away in the rain with her umbrella, the wind gusts and turns her umbrella inside out. As she's struggling, Jim jumps off the fire engine as its getting ready to leave, and runs to her aid. He tries to fix her umbrella but just ends up ruining it even more. Melinda throws it away, and continues walking, not really giving poor Jim the time of day. He keeps trying though, following her offering to buy her a new umbrella. When he asks if she's upset, she says "You threw my shoe at me and wouldn't believe me about the man!" Jim defends himself jokingly, "Tossed. I tossed it to you. There's a big difference. And how did you know he was in there anyway?" Melinda continues to walk saying it doesn't matter, but after a persistent Jim asks her if she's hungry and offers to take her out to the "Umbrella Restaurant", a curious Melinda agrees.
The "Umbrella Restaurant" turns out to be a hot dog stand covered by a green and yellow umbrella. They chat on a bench, Jim asks her out, and eventually they end up dating and getting married.
On their anniversary of meeting (yes, they celebrate the day they met), Melinda gives Jim a mini hot dog stand with a yellow and green umbrella that actually makes hotdogs. She's sad because she believes he's forgotten their anniversary. He loves the hotdog stand, and asks her to get his coat because he has to leave to go play poker with his friends. When she gets to the closet and opens it, and wrapped red umbrella falls out of the closet. Jim comes up behind her with champagne glasses and kisses her cheek, as Melinda starts to tear up and cry. She smiles happily and kisses him saying "I thought you forgot!".
Yes, its probably cheesy. But I love it. And I've always imagined meeting the man of my dreams in some way like that that we could celebrate.
Anthony and I met at Barnes & Noble, my first week working there. Anthony works there too. I remember watching him shelve books as I manned costumer service, alone, bored because the store was practically empty. Everyone had introduced themselves to me by now, all except for Anthony. I had decided that he was either really shy, gay or just a jerk. So I went up to him that day and just started talking to him, introduced myself, and asked him about random things like his age, what he was going to school for, how long he'd worked at Barnes & Noble, etc.
One of the books in his pile was "The Notebook" by Nicolas Sparks. I passingly mentioned I loved the movie but had never read the book. He said he loved the movie too. I'd stared blankly at him, because I'd never met a straight guy who liked "The Notebook". Even though my gaydar hadn't gone off, it still flew out of my mouth: "Are you gay?" I kicked myself inside for speaking without thinking. He laughed and said "Noo, why would you think that?" When I said it was because he loved "The Notebook", he said that he liked it because it had good acting, a good story line and was a good movie overall.
After that he asked me to go hang out with work people when they went out to Main St. and just randomly invited me to group things, before he asked me out on a double date with his sister and her boyfriend. Later he asked me out on our first date: Going to "Chicago" for some pizza, shopping at American Eagle (our favorite store) trying to pass the 45min wait, and then watching a movie at his place after we finished eating.
I think we went on one or two dates before becoming exclusive. It always seemed really quick to me, and I'm not sure if I was really ready to jump into a relationship that fast after barely dating him. He said he asked me that fast because he didn't want anyone else to steal me away. Which is sweet. :) We dated probably 3 months before he told me he loved me on a ski trip in January.
I'm not really complaining about my relationship. Its been going great, we're both happy. I guess just being the drama queen that I am, I was expecting something a little bit more glamorous, like Jim and Melinda's meeting. Anthony can't remember the day we met, and neither can I. There really isn't anything memorable or funny about our meeting, except for my blabbering out "Are you gay??". Anthony IS tall, with dark brown hair (looks black most days), and brown eyes. When I first saw him, I remember thinking he was pretty good looking, studious with his glasses. He's pretty skinny though, and doesn't have much muscle tone (though he's been working out again lately so maybe I'll have me a Taylor Launter in a few months, haha). But then again, I'm not very much like Melinda Gordon either. I've got red hair, pale skin, blue eyes, and I've gained a little weight since we started dating that I need to lose. I'm not much of a bombshell myself as of late, so why should I expect him to be?
I just wish our story had been a little more like my ideal: Melinda Gordon and Jim Clancy.
I want a great story about our meeting. I want to celebrate the day we met, but we can't remember what it was because it really wasn't very memorable.
Anthony and I argue a lot, and its usually about silly stuff. It can get pretty childish sometimes, and it frustrates me because in the back of my mind, I picture Melinda and Jim who rarely argue, and when they do its about adult things and ends with a kiss and full understanding of the other.
Anthony and I have good moments, but we don't really do a lot of cute dates or making dinner together or anything cliche like that. I wish we did.
I'm only 21, I know. I've got my whole life ahead of me, and that makes me also wonder if maybe that ideal is out there, and should I be looking? But I'm comfortable with Anthony, he's good for me, I do love him I think, but do I really know what love is, this early in my life?
I guess I'm just a little bored. Maybe we're in a rut? Also, Anthony is set on marriage, which is fine, but I just feel like now I know how everything is going to end/begin, like what is even the point of dating anymore? I feel as though this part of my life is already over, and I'm just waiting it out until he pops the question for the new part of my life to begin. I feel like all the fun and excitement has been sucked out. I'm not satisfied with this part of my life yet. There's still so much I want to do, that I feel I wouldn't be able to do if we were married. I don't want to assume we'll be together forever. I guess I just miss the fun and excitement of just dating and enjoying being together.
I know a lot of fun, creative stuff costs money, but there's so many inexpensive things we could do, even free.
I guess I'm also wondering if I'm being a little ridiculous. Because I'm wondering if Anthony and I are really right for each other, if maybe we're just in a rut because we ARE comfortable, or if I should still be looking for my Jim Clancy ideal.
I always thought I'd meet my ideal in a quirky, fun, memorable way just like Jim and Melinda did. A story that I could tell everyone with giggles, smiles that make me glow when I mention his name, and he'd tell his friends about how we met, how wonderful I am. A story we could tell to future kids maybe. That we'd go on fun dates and he'd pursue me in creative ways. That we'd go through the courting stages, when he's trying to impress me by making me dinner, taking me out on creative dates and surprising me with flowers. Trying to convince me that he's the perfect one for me, that I should pick him, date him, love him. We'd become official, and that the same kind of dates would continue, that we'd fall in love, eventually he'd propose in this super romantic creative way, and then we'd have an amazingly beautiful non-traditional (outside) wedding that everyone would remember as one of the best weddings they'd ever been to. We'd have the amazing romantic honeymoon at a Bed & Breakfast, someplace tropical or historic, and come home to our cute little house that we'd decorated in the most unique, homey way, and that we'd continue to live in newly wed bliss.
I guess I was expecting to be swept off my feet, but so far, I've felt pretty grounded.
Any thoughts anyone? Have any of you ever experienced these feelings, thoughts? Have you ever had an ideal? If so, who? I could really use some feedback.
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